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Grief and Recovery: Expectations vs. Reality

Grief and Recovery: Expectations vs. Reality

First, before we talk about what it means to recover from grief, let’s share a clear definition of what grief is. Grief is the normal and natural reaction to loss of any kind. Feelings you have that follow a loss are normal and natural for you. More often than not, we have been made to believe that our emotions are invalid, abnormal, and unnatural. Grief is one of the most emotional states of being and is very much misunderstood.

Grief is also the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behavior. Let me give you an example of contradictory emotions. My great-grandmother is experiencing a debilitating illness, and she looks to be suffering. When she passes away, I feel relieved because she no longer suffers from her illness. Yet, simultaneously, I can no longer talk with her, hug her, or care for her. I miss her, and I am sad. Her loss has caused me to feel conflicted.

Many other losses can cause us to feel similar conflicting feelings. We might think of divorce and death as the most apparent losses to produce feelings of grief. Though many more life events and experiences throughout our lifetimes create significant emotional loss, let’s name a few other losses we may experience, such as moving, graduation, marriage, health changes, loss of safety, financial changes, addictions, and many more.

What is grief recovery?When I first saw the words grief and recovery in the same sentence, it created confusion for me, as it may also be creating confusion for you. However, that was until I understood exactly what it means to recover from grief.

Simply put, recovery following one’s grief means feeling better. Recovery gives us some happiness back, our power to take control, and the ability to live without fear of being hurt again.

We get from grief recovery the freedom to enjoy or express our memories without fearing our regrets or remorse ruining that memory.

When you recover, you come out the other side knowing that being sad is normal and acceptable. You will also learn that sharing your truth and feelings with those around you is okay.

Recovery will help give you the tools you need to forgive others, especially when it comes to those who say or do things based on their lack of knowledge about grief. Many people grow up not knowing how to speak about grief, let alone being able to help others properly with their loss. With the tools and skills taught in grief recovery, not only will it help to heal your broken heart, but it will also allow you to be present in all of your relationships.

As a grief recovery specialist, I give you those tools and the skills to help heal your broken heart. I start by taking you through the 7-week evidence-based, educational, action-oriented program. This program has been shown to positively impact the healing and recovery of those affected by loss. The method is designed to help you with the pain, isolation, and loneliness you might feel caused by loss. I work online with my clients in a confidential, private home office setting, and we meet weekly at a time best suited for your needs.

People say you must let go and move on, but they don’t tell you how. The Grief Recovery Method 1-on-1 Program teaches you how to recover from loss with supportive guidance every step of the way. The 1-on-1 Action Program is exactly what it suggests—you are working on your recovery, guided by Cathleen, an Advanced Grief Recovery Method Specialist.

As a specialist, I have also gone through this exact process because I was impacted by loss in my life. It also helps me to empathize with and understand your feelings and need for healing.

I, too, have had personal experiences with the death of loved ones, pet loss, abandonment, divorce, and miscarriage. For many years, I carried the conflicting feelings of having suffered from unhealthy, abusive relationships that included sexual, mental, and physical abuse. Much of this grief was held on my shoulders, never knowing what to do with it. The Grief Recovery Method® helped to bring closure, relief, and forgiveness to some of these enormous losses.

Now that I have the tools to do something about that grief, I want to share these tools with others so that they can be free.


 

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